Seeds that Change Lives and the World

"In April, we cannot see sunflowers in France, so we might say the sunflowers do not exist. But thelocal farmers have already planted thousands of seeds, and when they look at the bare hills, they may be able to see the sunflowers already. The sunflowers are there. They Lack only the conditions of sun, heat, rain, and July. Just becaue we cannot see them does not mean that they do not exist."

~Thich Nhat Hanh


We may not see the blossoms of the seeds we plant today but they exist and as the sunflowers change the landscape of Tuscan hills, so do will each seed of goodness change lives and brighten our world!

The Dalai Lama and Mahatma Gandhi Give us Guidance for Life and Living, and How to Heal the World

During a time when out world is focusing on how to win wars, fix the economy, save bands and bail out businesses it is important to keep in our hearts and minds that which is of utmost concern, the true necessities of life.

The Dalai Lama reminds us,

"Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive."


While we may not have the answers to all the questions humankind is currently facing, we do have solutions for the challenges of life. We, each of us, can contribute to healing the world. We can participate in bringing forth peace and happiness, we can make a difference in the lives of our loved ones and those in our communities, even our sisters and brothers throughout the world.

How?

John Lubbock give us the answer:

"Do something, however small, to make others happier and better, is the highest ambition, the most elevating hope, which can inspire a human being."

And Gandhi:

"To give service to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer."

At times, when the problems of our world seem overwhelming, even insurmountable, I'm reminded to step back and make a little difference in my tiny corner of the world.

Mahatma Gandhi writes,

"I offer you peace. I offer you love. I offer you friendship. I see your beauty. I hear your need. I feel your feelings. My wisdom flows from the Highest Source. I salute that Source in you. Let us work together for unity and love."

May we work together for unity and love!

Darling artwork by Julie Brockett

Could you use a Moment of joy? A Little Bit of Brightness? Do you Want to See a Smile on your Face?

My Addiction and How to Create a Beautiful Life

I confess.

I have an addiction.

Some people are addicted to alcohol or drugs, some are addicted to shopping, gambling, or pornography.

My addiction is a little different. What is it you ask?

Collage making.

Yep, whenever I need a break, want to relax, or feel an urge to create I make a collage.

While my addiction may not actually, technically qualify as a true addiction in the most medical sense of the word, (I can stop if I want, and my collage making has never interfered with my life), still, at times I am pretty passionate about my hobby. I am a member of various groups, enter contests, and connect with collage makers all over the world.

It all started about ten years ago when I was studying art therapy and made my first collage out of paper, magazines, and pictures. All I can say was that I was hooked. I've made hundreds of collages and will most likely make thousands more.

And, now that there are online collage making sites, well, it makes it all the easier to indulge in my "addiction".

At this point I am not ready to give it up and haven't joined CMA (Collage Maker Anonymous... I'm making this organization up if you are wondering), but who knows what the future will hold?

Yesterday while engaging in my collage making activities, a thought came to me...

Life is a collage.

Let me explain.

When I make a collage, I gather pictures, symbols, designs, artwork, photography, quotes, and poetry from all over the world, and put them together in a new way, adding my own artwork and thoughts to bring forth something completely new. I build on what others have brought forth.

And, in making my collage, I add my own artwork, thoughts, and creations to the world for others to add upon.

Is this not life?

We take the information that has been gathered throughout human history, teachings from our schools and communities, ideals from our families and belief systems, and combine them into our individual minds, then we add our unique experiences, perspectives, and personality to create something new.

Then, as we live our life, we in turn bring something forth for others to add upon.

Our very lives are collages!

Now, there is a secret for creating a fabulous collage and it is the same secret to creating an incredible life.

To create a beautiful collage, I look for the most beautiful pictures I can find, the quotes that touch me deeply, the artwork that moves me. I discard the rest. Then I add my personal artwork and creativity.

Similarly, to create a beautiful life, we must seek out that which we believe will add goodness to our experience. We discard the rest. While, of course we live in the real world and can't eliminate all the ugliness and cruelty, but we can remove ourselves from some unhealthy situations and environments, we can release that which creates anxiety and destruction, and we can block or limit much of what diminishes our personal world and relationships.

Then we add our unique creativity to our experience.

Now, an important key to collage making for everyone who will attempt it: One NEVER, ever copies the work of another. It is unconscionable.

Similarly, we are not meant to be robotic clones just repeating what others require or demand. We are here to bring our unique creativity and creation to this world; to bring forth something for others to add to and build upon.

Most of us aren't going to create some new technology or write a brilliant philosophical work that will change the world, but all of us will bring something new to this world. Whether we bring forth more kindness, care, and joy, or more destruction, hatred, and violence is up to us.

We can ask ourselves, what will we embrace to create our life? What will we release?

How will we use our unique perspective and experiences to create something fabulous?

Will those who follow us have something lovely upon which to build?

Our life is a collage, the only question is, how beautiful will it be?

Death, Dying, and Living

It is rare that I write about my personal life but my thoughts are calling to be written.

Currently, my father is undergoing cancer treatment for Lymphoma. He is an exceptionally healthy man for his age and treatment will most likely be successful, but his experience on this Earth is limited.

Over the holidays I got to spend a few weeks with my father and siblings, (my mother passed on a few years ago), in my childhood home. I live on the other side of the country so do not get to visit nearly as often as I would like, so the time was enormously valuable. We had Christmas dinner together, enjoyed each others company, met with long time friends, and cleaned out old boxes of memories left in the attic.

My father and I had several discussions about life, as we always do.

One thing particularly struck me and keeps percolating in my brain.

How will you feel when you come to the end of your life?

I look at my father and realize how peaceful he is, how he radiates the energy of a man who has lived an honorable and beautiful life. He has the peace that only comes from having carefully lived a life of integrity, honesty, and care.

There is not a person who knows my father who doesn't think he is an outstanding human being. There is not a person alive who has anything other than the highest regards for my father. There is no one who who doesn't honor the life of my father as exemplary and outstanding in every way.

How many people have this sort of peace when they leave this life?

When I asked my father what his greatest accomplishment or achievement was, he responded, "I have a great family". He didn't mention his awards and medals from his service in the army, nor he didn't mention his extraordinary success as a business owner.

He lived his life so as to have no regrets. He was the best husband he could be, taking care of my seriously ill mother for years on end. He was the best father he could be, instilling us with the values of honor and decency. (I'm pretty sure I heard the words integrity and honesty before I knew my alphabet).

In all areas of his life he lived a noble life, treating others with respect and kindness.

If you were to ask my agnostic father what religion he is, he would say that his religion is kindness; in every way his life exemplifies this.

Now that I am home and back to my regular routine, I am reminded to live a life of nobility and honor. I hope that when my time here is finished, like my father, I can feel the peace of knowing I lived a good life with no regrets. I hope, like my father I can leave this world feeling it is better because I visited. I hope, like my father, my family and loved ones know how much I love and cherish them.

One of the gifts we receive from those who are ahead of us in life's journey, is the awareness to live without regrets. We can make changes while we are young. We can heal wounds and restore relationship. We can alter our course, eliminate bad habits, and embrace more of what is truly important.

We can choose today to live and outstanding life.

Today, I reflect on the end of life to remind myself how to live.

Thank you to my fabulous father!

A My New Quote for the Year..... A beautiful way to live all summed up in one paragraph!

The following quote is going on my vision board for the year!

I'm going to memorize it and use it as my new mantra for those times when I am not living in my highest good!

"Be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.

Talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.

Make all your friends feel there is something in them.

Look at the sunny side of everything.

Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best.

Be as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.

Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

Give everyone a smile.

Spend so much time improving yourself that you have no time left to criticize others.

Be too big for worry and too noble for anger."

~Christian D. Larson

So simple....and certainly life changing; spend so much time embracing goodness that there is no time for any negativity in your life!

The Most Important Ten Questions to Ask Yourself

Have you ever asked yourself, "What is wrong with me?"

Or, "Why isn't my life better?"

Or, Why is everyone else so lucky?"

Or, "Why did my parents do this to me?"

My guess is that most of us have asked similar questions now and then.

If you have, then you have most likely come up with some good answers to your questions.

The problem is, the answers may not be exactly true. In fact they may be very far from the truth. In addition, they probably lead you to feeling negatively about yourself, your situation, and your life.

As you answer these questions, you confirm in your mind and spirit that there is something wrong with you, that your life is not going well, and that there is someone to blame for your problems.

See, as human beings, our brains developed a deeply ingrained propensity (and an amazing skill) to answer the questions we ask ourselves.

Right or wrong we answer the questions... it seems our brains are not so interested in the right answers, only that there are answers.

So guess what? If you ask yourself what is wrong with you, you will find the answers. If you ask yourself why you always have problems, you will provide yourself with an answer. If you ask who is to blame for a difficulty you will find someone.

On the other hand, if you ask yourself how you got to be so wonderful, you will come up with an answer as well. If you ask yourself how you became so talented, you will discover some people to thank.

With that in mind, it is valuable, perhaps essential for a healthy life to ask yourself the right questions.

Here are ten questions to ask yourself... ten questions that will get you positive, productive, and beneficial answers.


1. What am I grateful for?

2. What gifts and talents do I have to share?

3. How did I get to be so fabulous and amazing?

4. What is right with me?

5. How did I get to be so lucky/blessed?

6. What do I need to embrace or change to live as my best self?

7. How can I make a positive difference in the world?

8. Who influenced my life for good?

9. How do I envision my ultimate future?

10. Who needs my love and care?

Now just listen to yourself answer these questions... (no, "I don't knows" allowed).

If we become aware of the questions we ask ourselves, and consciously revise them by asking the great questions that bring forth positive, healing, and helpful answers, we start moving in a whole new direction.

The Universe Like You Have Never Seen It Before... Really!

Would you like to see what the Universe actually looks like? Would you like to know how the universe began? Would you like to know how it came into existence?

Now you can! (I've linked the video below)

Within the last year, scientists have brought us to the point where we have a very clear picture of what this universe looks like... and you can see it!

As we receive images from the Hubble and other space telescopes we are seeing the universe as it was billions of years ago and with this information scientists are able to put together a rendered, computerized model, based on photos of this very universe, as if we are seeing it from outside (if such a place existed. We can even "glimpse" dark matter for the first time in the history of the world. Well, we can't really see it because it doesn't respond to light but we know its patterns and structure.

Today, (as in right this minute as you read this), we are discovering more about this place in which we find ourselves.

Did you know there are an estimated 100 billion galaxies in our universe? That is a large number, difficult to conceptualize so it may help to realize that this number is about equivalent to the number of grains of sand on the Earth. In other words there is a galaxy for every grain of sand on the planet.

And each of these 100 billion galaxies has about 100 billion stars.

In other words, there are about 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 stars in our universe.

The number is incomprehensible.

And, of all those stars there are many, perhaps most that have solar systems with planets circling around them. Who knows how many planets are out there? What sort of other life forms might exist?

So, if you want to see the very latest images and models of the universe, I invite you to watch a fabulous video of a brief presentation by astrophysicist, cosmologist, and Nobel Prize winner George Smoot, shared by TED Talks* and Serious Play.

It is truly stunning.

See the Universe as you have never seen it before.... Click here!

*If you are not familiar with TED talks (Technology, Entertainment, Design), now may be a good time to check it out. Each year a the TED conference, TED gathers invited speakers from around the world to share their latest research, designs, and creativity with the world. The twenty minute talks are video taped and placed on the TED talks website for all of us to see. This is a fabulous way to keep abreast of all the latest information bubbling into existence the world over.

One Hundred Trillion Moments of Goodness

There are about one hundred trillion cells in the human body. Put another way, you are comprised of approximately 100,000,000,000,000 cells.

This is pretty amazing.

But what astounds me even more than this huge number is that all these cells came from two; two cells from which all one hundred trillion cells in our body have emerged.

Now, as amazing as this is another little fact that I can hardly get my brain around is that, those two little cells that come together, divide into four. Those four cells divide into eight and so on it goes. And, in only fifty divisions, the whole of the human is created.

Only fifty divisions and two cells become 100 trillion.

I can't quite get over this.

It seems impossible and yet, it is the reality of the development of the human.

It got me thinking.

What if for every good event that came into our lives, we doubled it. For each smile, we gave two. For every kind word, we spoke two. For every good deed, we gave two.

We double each wonderful moment, every second of kindness, all those brief encounters that brought us peace.

In only fifty encounters, there would be 100 trillion wonderful moments of goodness.

Hmmm.... I'm going to try it.

How Wonderful It Is.....

How Wonderful It Is... by Jennifer

100 Tips and Tricks for Women over Forty, (or Fifty, or Sixty, or Seventy, or Beyond) to Feel and Look Absolutely Fabulous

This post is in honor of all the wonderful women who have given me a great example of how to move into middle age with respect, dignity, and grace.

While our culture may send the message that life for women, stops at twenty five, we all know that life gets better as we get older. I mean who would want to go back?

This post is not about being what others want you to be or trying to fight off the aging process, nor is it about succumbing to ill health and giving up.

It is about being your best self, feeling good about who you are, and going through our life transitions with grace!

So for all those women over forty, fifty, sixty, seventy or more, here you go....

100 tips and tricks to help you feel wonderful, look beautiful, and live vibrantly at any age:

1. Smile! Smile a lot! Nothing is more attractive than a genuine heartfelt smile!

2. Get a lot of anti-oxidants into your body. The more you get these amazing nutrients into your body, the more they can get rid of any unwanted poisons!

3. Don't wear short skirts – just above or just below the knee is about right. This length is the most flattering for most women.

4. Earrings can add a nice touch to your look. A simple classy pair of earrings can jazz up the most casual outfit.

5. The darker the lipstick, the deeper the wrinkles appear. Too shiny is going to run off your lips; too matt is going to look like chalk. Go for a softer natural glossy look.

6. Keep your hair shiny. A wash in glaze, a conditioning serum, or a spray gloss makes your hair reflect the light and adds a little spark to your look!

7. Dark pants are more flattering for nearly everyone. Yes, this is true. Just look around! Unless you want to really show off your lower half, stay away from large, bold, and bright prints and designs.

8. Unless you are twenty pounds UNDER weight, straight legs are a no. They may be in style but this doesn’t mean they look good.

9. Move your body. We can’t all run a marathon, spend three hours a day in the gym, or have a personal trainer. But we can all move. Do whatever you can do. Step it up. Go outside your comfort zone and push yourself a bit. You will feel better!

10. Get enough sleep! There is no better beauty tip. We all know how we look when we have to function on less than adequate sleep. Eight hours is about right!

11. Eat some nuts every day. They are full of all sorts of great nutrients! Yes, they have fat but the good kind! Try a handful of walnuts or almonds when you need a snack!

12. Eat fresh and whole foods. Organic and local produce is the best when possible! Try natural farm eggs, or range fed meats. Move from canned or frozen to fresh. Skip all the processed, additives, fake garbage, and fast food and eat actual foods that have energy from the sun!

13. Drink at least eight glasses of water a day. I know we all know this, still it is one of the most important keys for feeling well and lively.

14. Take some really seriously deep breaths every day. Conscious breathing, filling your lungs and exhaling slowly is a renewing habit to get into! Each morning before you brush your teeth, or on your way home from work, schedule in a few deep breaths.

15. Exfoliating your skin is a must! Get that old tired dead skin off your form and allow the fresh vibrant skin to shine! There are great products on the market and expensive doesn’t always mean better. Some over the counter products you find in the drugstore are just as effective as the high end and pricey alternatives.

16. Stretch your form. Yoga, Pilate's, or the stretches you learned in high school gym class are good options. Your body needs to keep those ligaments flexible and in good condition.

17. Teeth whiteners are quick and easy! A five day over the counter treatment is an easy way to remove decades of tea and coffee stains!

18. Dark or vibrant nail polish makes finger and hands look aged. Stick with a nice neutral or have a French manicure.

19. Perfumes and body sprays are a nice way to add a touch of care and pleasantness to our day. What is your favorite scent? While some perfumes are glamorous and expensive, you can find nice alternatives or natural scents for much less.

20. Exercise your eyes. At least once a day, take a minute to look in every direction, roll your eyes around; during the day look close then into the distance several times. Keep those eyes in good shape.

21. Elastic waistbands are seriously out! They may be comfortable or easy to wear but they can't help but make you feel and look really, really, frumpy. Today you can find nice comfortable clothing without the need for stretchy waists.

22. Suntan pantyhose, popular in the eighties (or was that the seventies) are out of style. If you feel a need to wear hose with dresses, try dark tights, fish nets, or a fashionable opaque.

23. The length of a sweater, jacket or blouse should not be the same length of the sleeve. If they are you look like a box.

24. If you are a large woman, don't wear little tiny prints, if you are very petite, stay away from huge prints.

25. Lighter colors are seen first. In other words, wherever you wear the lightest color will appear the largest and stand out the most. A general rule: wear the lightest colors on the areas you want to draw attention to, the darkest colors on the areas you want least attention.

26. Wear clothes that fit you well. If something doesn't quite fit, don't buy it or have it tailored. You may be surprised how inexpensive it is to have a skirt hemmed or a blouse taken in.

27. Eliminate those foods you know do not agree with you. Your body is trying to tell you it does not want that particular food. If pizza always gives you heartburn, don't eat it.

28. A great haircut can do wonders for your mood and for your sense of style. It may be a good idea to have fewer haircuts but pay a little more for a really fabulous look.

29. Wear sunscreen! The basic rule should be, keep your skin covered with sunscreen if you are leaving the house. We all know how the sun creates wrinkles and brown spots on our skin. No need to encourage this.

30. Engage in those activities that brighten your life. We can get busy, or we can get lazy... either way we may forget to do what we love. Think of all those activities throughout your life that you enjoyed and re-engage!

31. Focus on your assets. Many women don't exactly love their bodies but we can usually find one or two or even three things we like right? Maybe it is your full lips, or soft hands, or long neck. Whatever you can find put all your attention there. Highlight it. Think about it. Remember it. Draw attention to it. The more you are focusing on the great things about yourself the less you will worry about the less than wonderful!

32. Get rid of all the make-up, hair supplies, and extra stuff you have around that take up space and create clutter in your dressing area. Go through your lip stick and throw out all those outdated colors that you never wear. Dump old bottles of whatever that you don't use. Do a major overhaul and only keep what you love and need!

33. Gray hair can look fabulous! If you don't color your hair, make sure to keep it healthy with a stylish cut. If you do color your hair, most women look good with a color similar to their natural color. Too dark or too light can look odd, fake, and even draining.

34. Sparkles, designs, and other attention grabbing designs on your butt do not help you look young. Truly they don't! They make you look, well, never mind. Stick with sleek and chic not trendy and cheap.

35. Capris are really unflattering. They are about the worst fashion design anyone has come up with. Long walking shorts are a good alternative.

36. Fresh fruits and vegetables are important for anyone who wants to be healthy and vibrant. A nice large salad or a minimum of five servings a day will help you feel great!

37. See your health care professional. Make sure you get a nice check up every year. I know it is not the most enjoyable way to spend your time but it is important, possibly life saving!

38. Meditate every day. We hear this all the time and it is true. Taking time each day to slow down, reconnect with yourself, and spend some time in silence is a must for anyone wanting to live a full life.

39. Dressing like a hooker doesn't look youthful, it looks silly and tawdry (even on younger women). Of course older women can look fabulous, sexy, and downright hot but it doesn't happen by showing off everything. It happens by creating a sense of allure and interest.

40. Get your mammogram. I know, I know. It isn't fun. Do it anyway!

41. Yes, less is more… definitely. The more you cake on the foundation the more it settles into wrinkles. The ten coats of mascara don't make your eyelashes look long it makes them look heavy and plastic. The ultra bright red hair color doesn't look wild and sexy, it looks like paint. Bright orange or red streaks on your cheeks look more clown-like than glamorous. Less is more... make it a mantra!

42. A little highlighter under the arch of the eyebrow and at the inner corners of the eye is a great tip for brightening and opening the eye.

43. Take your vitamins. Go for the best, most natural and healthful you can afford or find.

44. Unless you are playing volley-ball or a running track, short shorts are a seriously bad idea for pretty much everyone over twelve. If you are over forty, even in great shape they just make you look desperate. You want to look appropriate and chic not like a teenager.

45. Long straight hair parted down the middle went out with Marsha Brady! If you love long hair, make sure it is cut and styled well and in nice condition! Short hair if cut well can look very hip and youthful, but if it is cut in an old and matronly style it will create a very tired and old fashioned look!

46. Only purchase clothes you love. If you have to convince yourself that it is a good purchase leave it on the rack. Too often we have closets full of clothes with nothing to wear. If you want to feel great, wear clothes that help you feel and look your best.

47. Eat a few slices of avocado every day. They are so packed with essential nutrients that they should have their own food group!

48. Enjoy your loved ones. There is nothing like being around those who love to brighten your life and make you feel alive! Demonstrate your love to your partner and family, play with grandchildren or pets, reach out to your friends. It is what life is all about!

49. Have great posture. Stand up with your shoulders back, tummy in, bottom tight. Sit up straight. Practice what it feels like to keep your body in alignment. This alone can help you feel and look better almost instantly!

50. Take care of your medical needs. Have you been putting of a procedure you know you need? Do you have symptoms that need addressing? Don't put off taking care of what might get worse and become more problematic in the future.

51. Wear colors that you know look great on you. You will feel better just by wearing them. If you have blue eyes why not find a great vibrant blue? Or if you know you look good in dark red, why not purchase your next sweater in cranberry? Older women are not stuck with black. In fact in some instances black can be a little harsh. Notice what tones you love, what colors help you feel fabulous!

52. Create a mission statement! Remind yourself why you are on the earth, what you are here to do, and what you want to accomplish while upon the earth!

53. Have a massage. This is a fabulous way to give yourself care. While a massage may seem pricey, most of us can save five dollars or so a month to have a massage once a year. In fact give up a latte, energy drink, or candy bar once a week and see how quickly you could save up for a real treat!

54. Eat your fiber. Most people get only about eight grams of fiber a day when we should be eating about 25 grams or more! You will be surprised at how wonderful you feel when your body is getting the right amount of this vital substance. (Make sure you are drinking your eight glasses of water)!

55. Three quarter length sleeves are attractive on most every woman. It is a most flattering look for nearly all older women. A slight A-line skirt is a nice flattering style for most women.

56. Visit the dentist. If you can't make it the recommended every six months, at least go in once a year to make sure your teeth, gums, and mouth are in good shape.

57. Don't buy clothes just because they are on sale. They may be inexpensive but if they are going to hang in your closet, take up space, or look terrible on you, don't waste your money!

58. Share your wisdom. The longer we live the more experience we have to help others. I’m think the world can use all the help and wisdom we can get from our elders.

59. The length of hair is less important than the style. While many women feel they look better with an updated style, it is important that you find a style that you love and that works for your lifestyle. Bangs add a youthful and flattering look for most women regardless of age.

60. If you are bottom heavy, look for styles that emphasis the shoulder. Boat neck tops, a puffy shoulder or even a small shoulder pad in the garment can help create the illusion of better proportions.

61. If you are top heavy, look for styles that emphasis the hip. Again, working toward creating balance, extra pockets, gathers and material in the lower area help.

61. Improve your food choices. Have you considered going vegetarian? Have you tired eating more raw foods? Eliminating dairy? Giving up fast food? Maybe go organic? We can all improve our eating habits and there is no time like the present to start! You don't need to eat perfectly every day for the rest of your life but you can pick one way to improve right this very minute!

62. Go for quality not quantity. Better to have two really fabulous sweaters than a closet full of not so nice, frumpy, and matronly ones. And great quality doesn't always mean super expensive. But cheap is cheap and you don't want your clothes falling apart after one wash!

63. Wear the right bra! You won't believe how important this is. Don't go for the frilly, flimsy, faddish, or fancy. Go for the FIT! Find a bra that truly fits you, keeps you in good form, and supports your body properly! You won't be sorry for this investment! I promise!

64. Turtlenecks and hip scarves are a great option for women who feel they need a little camouflage for their necks. V necks look good on most everyone. They elongate the neck line and help to bring attention to the face. Stay away from the plunging revealing necklines (in public) unless you add a little cami underneath.

65. Show your confidence. One of the best things about older women is their sense of self confidence. Ask anyone... confidence is sexy!

66. Pointy shoes are flattering but too pointy can look ridiculous. If you can't wear them and walk normally, they are not the right shoes for you. A small one inch kitten heal is a nice option for women who want the look of a high heel but the comfort of a walking shoe.

67. Eliminate a bad habit. We all have them, but some may impact us more than others. Why not quit smoking? Stop using alcohol? Eliminate a TV addiction? Might it be good to reduce the online purchases? Reduce the ice cream consumption? Get help with a gambling problem?

68. Keep your mind engaged. Every day make sure you are learning something new. Play board games, do Sudoku or crossword puzzles. Play computer games. Just don't let your brain muscle atrophy!

69. Lightweight fabrics show every little bulge, roll, ripple, and dimple. Heavier weighted material can help hide a million little flaws. When in doubt, check it out before leaving the house.

70. Think classic not faddish. Purchase clothes that will last a while rather than those items of clothing that will be out of style next season!

71. Start your day on a positive note. Listen to great music as you get ready for the day. Play a motivational CD on your way to work. Do the sunrise salutation upon awakening. We know that how we start the morning often creates a tone for the day, so do whatever works for you!

72. Do what you can. As we get older we have a tendency to not do what takes effort. But keeping up with what we can will keep us healthy. Lift, stretch, and reach.

73. Most women look best in sweaters, blouses, and jackets when the length is between the waist and the crotch.

74. Guess what, wearing clothing that is too small does not make you look smaller. It does the opposite. Guess what else? Holding onto clothing a few sizes too small and wearing ridiculous stuff until you lose those extra pounds, is not helping you lose weight. It is only compounding the problem. Better to pack away the clothes that do not fit, purchase a few items that help you feel fantastic, and if you lose the weight you can open the box of smaller clothes. If you don't loose weight, you can donate the clothes to those who could really use them.

75. Wide leg, trouser style pants look best on most women. Long pants look best and give you the longest line when they cover the shoe but don't hit the floor.

76. Read up on Menopause. Whether you are in peri-menopause, going through the change or are post menopausal, you probably noticed some new physical and emotional challenges. While many women struggle through these years, there are a lot of options to help with all the various symptoms of the change of life. Don’t underestimate how this change may affect you!

77. Ultra frosty eye shadow, florescent lips, and sparkly cheeks are just plain unattractive on anyone older than seventeen. Best leave the sparkles for Tinkerbell and fairy princesses.

78. Vertical seeming, stripes, and details elongate the torso and are flattering on most women. The reverse is also true; horizontal stripes and patterns widen the body and are usually less flattering.

79. Dirty shoes, ripped clothes, and unwashed anything don't exactly look chic, classy, or attractive. If a garment is stained, torn, or looking shabby, clean it, mend it, or toss it.

80. Get rid of clothing that makes you feel and look old. Worn out dresses, stretched out sweaters, faded pants are just not going to help you feel vibrant and youthful. Even just seeing this tired garments hanging in the closet makes us feel old. Throw them out!

81. Release unhealthy relationships. If you have friends that are harming your mental, emotional, or physical health, now is a good time to let them go. We all want to be loyal friends but when our lives are in jeopardy, it is time to move on.

82. Show your style. Too many fashion designers want women to look like they think they should rather than let women express who they are through their clothing. If you love something and feel great in it, and know you look wonderful don't let a fashion dictator tell you otherwise!

83. Stop watching depressing shows on television. Just eliminating this one little life diversion is sure to get you moving in another direction and feeling better about our world.

84. Accessorize with flair. If you have classic clothing, you can add trends to your accessories. Or if you prefer clothing in neutrals, why not add some color with fun bracelets or necklaces? If your style is a little too romantic or funky for a total look, use your accessories to add a little extra flourish!

85. Try shape wear. Of course today we have all sorts of underwear options that can smooth and shape the body. While many brands certainly work well, they also may be rather uncomfortable and restrictive. See what works for you.

86. Travel. I'm not suggesting you must travel the world, or even spend lots of time traipsing around your country. But get out and see what is around you. Visit the sights. Take advantage of what is around you. I'm willing to bet there are places in your area that you have not visited. Remember how important it is to say moving, learning, and engaged.

87. Floss your teeth. In the hecticness of life, flossing is not usually at the top of the list of things we must do. However, our teeth don't last forever so we need to do what we can to keep our teeth and gums healthy for as long as possible! One minute a day.. that is all it takes!

88. Moisturize your body. As we age our skin changes; it gets thinner and dryer. To help your skin remain healthy, moisturize it. Use whatever works for you but get into the habit of using a wonderful moisturizer twice a day!

89. Show your collar bones. Most women, have a nice shoulder and collar bone area. Clothing that highlights this part of the body is often quite flattering and draws attention upward to the face.

90. Get involved in life. Join a neighborhood club. Visit local historical sights. Become a docent. Find a way to keep up your interests and activities!

91. No ugly shoes allowed. Today you can find great styles of shoes that are totally comfortable. I can't think of a better indicator that a woman has given up on herself than when she starts wearing seriously ugly shoes because they are "comfortable"! Comfortable does not equate to ugly! A pair or two of fabulous shoes is better than a closet full of unattractive shoes that give you blisters.

92. Love your loved ones. We know that being with loved ones helps us emotionally, mentally, and even physically. Demonstrate love to your family, play with your pets, and do what you can to keep those relationships alive and thriving!

93. Dance. Moving your body, learning new steps, and getting your blood flowing is a wonderful way to keep young and vibrant. Look for classes in your community, purchase a used CD, or just find a time when you are alone and take a few minutes to dance when no one is looking! You will feel great!

94. Most women are flattered by styles that accent the smallest part of their torso which is usually right under the breasts. Jackets that close at the midriff, shirts that have empire seeming, or dresses that flow from this area are almost universally attractive.

95. Serve others. There is no better way to feel great about yourself than giving to those who need a little extra support and care.

96. Be at a healthy weight. While we don’t need to worry about looking like a twenty year old, we do know that dozens of health problems are associated with an unhealthy weight.

97. Eat your berries! Everyday, make sure you are eating blackberries, raspberries, blueberries, pomegranate or some other dark berry. Your body and mind will not thank you enough!

98. Worrying too much about wearing the latest trend makes no sense. As women get older they tend to not want to spend enormous amounts of time shopping. So, shop carefully and purchase items for the long term.

99. Grow older gracefully. This doesn't mean you give up on yourself, ignore grooming, and fade into the dark. It means that you mature with grace. You make life transitions with dignity. You respect who you are. You live in each phase of life in the best way you can.

100. Be yourself. As the saying goes, "better to be a first class you than a second rate someone else"! VERY TRUE!


With gratitude to all the fabulous women who are beautiful examples of what it means to mature with grace,

Jennifer

p.s. I have some pretty amazing women readers so if you have something to add please feel free to share your secrets, tips, and wisdom!


Artwork by one of my favorite artists, Mary Cassatt

Ten Ways to Feel Better About the World Right Now!

Over the last few weeks, we have listened to all sorts of bad news facing our world. Tumbling stocks, failed banks, lost jobs, and a world in crisis.

Many of us have never faced a serious recession and are feeling concern even fear as we contemplate what is to come over the next few years.

The concern, negativity, and worry can impact us in ways we may not even recognize, from feeling anxious and tired, to experiencing anger and frustration.

All of these emotions take their toll on our bodies, our minds, and our spirits, and, we often take out our subconscious worries and unhealthy concerns on those we love.

Most of us are not in the position to physically, significantly impact the world's banking structure, the powerful governments, or the fluctuating price of oil, however we can alter our attitudes, our emotions, and our approach to our current situation.

So, here are ten ways to help us feel better about the world, right now.

1. Turn off the TV. Stop the constant flow of the news media inundating us with concerned messages and the nastiness of the political campaigns.

2. Make a gratitude list. Start focusing on all the great things in your life. Write these down and don't stop until you have at least a hundred things. The more are minds and hearts are focused on the good the less room there is for the negativity.

3. Participate with nature. Get out and take a walk, work in the garden, visit a park, or play with a pet. Nature can be a means of reconnecting with truth, reviving ones heart and spirit.

4. Play. If you are lucky enough to have children nearby, play with them. Children are not concerned with the price of gas, which politician is desperate, or what stocks are going down. Moving into a child's work can restore hope while we remember what is important in life. If children are not nearby, find some friends and play a board game, get some play dough, or go to a park and watch young families having fun on the playground.

5. Enjoy the simple pleasures of life. Notice. Observe. Become aware. Pay attention to the sounds of loved ones, the colors of nature, the smells of fall. Reflect on why you smile, what touches your heart, what keeps you alive.

6. Create something. Creativity is an amazing healer; whether you enjoy art, music, poetry, woodworking, cooking, gardening, building something, etc., it doesn't matter, what matters is that you bring forth something. And, no you do not have to be artistic to create something. (smile) The point is not to make some incredible work of art but to acknowledge and embrace a part of you that yearns for expression.

7. Set some goals. Now is a great time to make some plans for your life. Write down what you truly want; create a collage to remind yourself of your passions and hopes; read some books on personal development. Whatever helps you move toward fulfilling your dreams and accomplishing your desires is great!

8. Embrace your spiritual, religious, or philosophical truths. Most of the world's faith traditions have an element of hope that can often be enormously beneficial during difficult times. Are there scriptures, poems, myths, or stories that give you a sense of hope? Today would be a good time to revisit these.

9. Pray, meditate, or embrace silence. There is no time like the present to commune with the Divine or experience Source. Whatever your belief system, quieting the mind and moving into a quiet contemplative state can bring great peace to a troubled mind or worried soul.

10. Help someone! With much of our world cutting back in donations and spending, now is a FABULOUS time to donate your time, help a neighbor, or engage in little acts of kindness.

We often fear a crisis; it can paralyze us, fill us anxiety, and keep us in a stagnant state.

However, I recall the Chinese symbol for crisis... it translates to, "dangerous opportunity."

Our current situation is a time to release the danger and embrace the opportunity; to move away from the hurt and pain and find what is healing and beautiful.

Difficult times are those times we reflect on where we are and where we want to be. We reconsider our choices, analyze our behaviors, and ponder our path. It is time of struggle as we grow and evolve.

What opportunities are ahead?

Where do we want to go?

How can we bring forth a new world?

I want a President who.... ten qualities and characteristics

As the citizens of the United States of America face an upcoming election we are noticing quite a nasty election filled with nonsense and misleading even deceptive claims as various leaders vie for the highest office in our land.

Believing that the more we hold in our hearts and minds a vision of what we want and where we want to go, the more we will move to that reality, I hold a vision of the kind of leader I want for my Country.

Here are ten qualities and characteristics I would like to see in a President:

1. I want a President whose basic conduct and behavior is exemplary and beyond criticism; a leader who is honest and filled with integrity and decency.

2. I want a President who surrounds her or himself with other knowledgeable, informed, and truly decent human beings.

3. I want a President who, as we move into the twenty-first century holds a clear vision of what is possible for our Country's future.

4. I want a President who cherishes our constitution and the ideals of our founders including freedom and equality for all.

5. I want a President who is aware of, and understands the daily and diverse challenges we all face, including the struggles of our economny, improved education, health care needs, etc.

6. I want a President who is knowledgeable and informed about world affairs; the current difficulties as well as those that lie ahead for our planetary family.

7. I want a President who cares about our Earth, its inhabitants and the future of our human existence.

8. I want a President who is respectful of the many cultures, races, religions, belief systems, faith traditions, and philosophies of our human population.

9. I want a President who doesn't make decisions for her or his own self-aggrandization or ego, or to pad the pockets of his or her friends, but who bases decisions on what is best for our country.

10. I want a President who can lead our country with honor, who can restore hope for the future; one who holds a vibrant vision of peace and prosperity for all.

While obviously I would love to have a President who reflects and embraces my personal opinions of the various issues, and it would be wonderful to have those in power match my ideals and beliefs in all cases, but more than this I want our President to be a visionary, a decent person who reflects honor and goodness.

Lets vote!

Why Setting Goals is a Fabulous Idea...Amazing Research will Motivate You

We all know we should set goals.

We know they are good for us, important to our success, and even necessary to accomplish much in life.

This is nothing new.

The problem comes when, even knowing how important goals are, we fail to set them, write them down, and actually get working on them.

Human nature is often filled with delays, objections, laziness, and procrastinations... we just do not always do what we know is good for us.

Sound familiar?

I came across some amazing research several years ago that instilled in me a strong desire to set goals. It has been a powerful force in my life.

I need to remind myself of this right now, so thought I would share it with any of you who may need a little spark of motivation as well.

So consider this post a friendly reminder and motivator to help you set and achieve your goals!

In the inspiring book, What They Don't Teach you at Harvard Business School, Mark McCormack, writes of a Harvard study, "conducted between 1979 and 1989 asking graduates of the MBA program, "Have you set clear, written goals for your future and made plans to accomplish them?"

"It turned out that only 3 percent of the graduates had written goals and plans. Thirteen percent had goals, but they were not in writing. Fully 84 percent had no specific goals at all, aside from getting out of school and enjoying the summer.

"Ten years later, in 1989, the researchers interviewed the members of that class again. They found that the 13 percent who had goals that were not in writing were earning, on average, twice as much as the 84 percent of students who had no goals at all. But, most surprisingly, they found that the 3 percent of graduates who had clear, written goals when they left Harvard were earning, on average, ten times as much as the other 97 percent of graduates all together. The only difference between the groups was the clarity of the goals they had for themselves when they graduated."*

The conclusion of many experts is just having goals, and writing them down is a powerful motivator to accomplishment and success.

Of course this alone is not enough but it seems that the very first step of clarity of goals often sets one on the path to achievement.

Do you have clear goals?

Have you writing them down?

Do you look at them every day?

I know I am revisiting my goals and getting clarity on where I want my life to heads.

Without a goal we are often wandering in the wilderness, unsure of where we want to go. Once we set a clear goal we have a direction. We have taken the first step to embracing our desire.



*This summary of the Harvard research is taken from Brian Tracy's fabulous book, Goals, How to Get Everything You Want - Faster Than You Ever Thought Possible. I highly recommend this book for those who are interested in success in life.

Why Setting Goals is a Fabulous Idea...

Appreciate Life and Loved Ones... They can Be Gone in a Moment

Last Christmas my family did not receive our usual Christmas card from our dear friends, the Walkers.

We have been family friends for many years but as if often the case, living across the country from each other, our interaction has been reduced to a Christmas card and a brief get together every few years.

The missing Christmas card and family picture did not give me much concern knowing how busy life is during the holidays.

However, last week I learned the reason we didn't receive our Christmas card.

I'm still in shock.

Life can change in a minute.

Jeff and his son went shopping at Trolley Square, a down town shopping center in Salt Lake City Utah to purchase some Valentine presents for his wife Vickie.

While he and his son were enjoying the time together, a man showed up with a gun and held it toward the son's face. Jeff stepped in front of his son to protect him, and the gunman shot him in the face killing him instantly.

In a few seconds, the lives of this fabulous family were forever changed.

While I do not like to think about the horrible events that occur every day throughout our world, this incident has reminded me to appreciate each moment of our lives.

I am reminded how fleeting life is.

I am reminded to express appreciation and gratitude to my loved ones.

I am reminded to live each moment to its fullest.

I am reminded to remember what is really important in life.

Mostly, I am vividly reminded to express my love to my family and friends.

May we learn from the tragedies and sorrows of life.

You are the Rainbow

I woke up before dawn and drove up the windy deserted back road to the secluded waterfall.

Snoqualmie Falls, in the Cascade Mountains of Washington State had been a favorite place of mine since I was a child, long before it had become the tourist attraction it is today.

Although I had visited the falls scores of times throughout my childhood, still it was a magical and meditative place for me.

While later in the day there would be crowds of visitors, snapping pictures and enjoying the beauty of nature, no one would be visiting at this early hour. The sun had yet to rise and the area was deserted.

I had the falls to myself along with the woodland creatures who lived there.

I walked up the path to the area created for sightseers to get the most spectacular view; an overlook that reached out over the falls. It was created to give the illusion that there was nothing beneath you and it certainly achieved its purpose.

This particular Spring day was the perfect day to see the falls in all their glory. The water poured over the rocky ledge providing any onlooker with the full effect of the power and glory of a waterfall.

As often as I have visited Snoqualmie Falls, I will never get used to its majesty or magic.

The roar of the water was deafening; much louder that the roar of a jet plane, it surrounded me and I felt it vibrate into my soul.

The power of the water falling was so intense that the spray burst several hundred feet high. Within moments I became completely drenched from the spray of the water as it splashed onto the rocks at the bottom of the cliff.

The sky was getting lighter and I knew dawn was about to break. I found myself not wanting to move and and shut my eyes to experience the falls without sight.

As I opened my eyes, there was the sun brilliantly rising from behind the waterfall.

There in front of me was the largest rainbow I had ever seen. I felt like I was in the rainbow, or the rainbow was me. The rainbow wasn't out there across the horizon, but in and on me. I was a part of it.

In a flash of awareness, I realized how similar this rainbow is to our human experience on this planet.

We look at a rainbow as a thing, out there somewhere, but in truth it is the image we see as billions of tiny drops of moisture reflect light. Each little drop has the totality of the experience, yet as these little drops comes together they brighten our world with their collective reflections.

So too in our world. Each of us is the reflection of light. We are not separate from the experience of light but are the manifestation of its energy and beauty.

While in a rainbow, each drop of moisture transforms the suns energy into color, we each transform the suns energy into our life.

Everything, EVERYTHING we bring forth in our lives is a demonstration of how we are transforming the sun's energy.

Like the water droplets, we are a means to take the light and bring forth something new. We can transform energy into a smile, an act of kindness, a poem, or a gentle touch.

In fact, there is nothing that exists on our planet that is not a transformation of the sun's energy.
While we have yet to discover how much choice other life forms have in their use of energy to create, as humans we have the sense that through consciousness and awareness we can decide how we want to transform energy, and what we want to bring forth on this Earth and into the Universe.

What I believe is that like little droplets each of us is part of something more grand than we can imagine.

Together we create the Rainbow.




This event happened several years ago while I was living in the Northwest. Today I live in Virginia.

The Absolutely, Positively, 100% Guaranteed Way to Improve Your Life... and it is FREE!

Have you ever counted all the self-help books on the shelves of a book store? Or noticed the numbers of audio programs available to help with any problem? How about all the books on religion? Psychic healing or wellness?

We live in a day when there are virtually unlimited sources to teach us how to have a better life.

We could spend hundreds of lifetimes trying to learn all the knowledge that is available to help us have a better life.

Not to discount any of the amazing ideas, beliefs, programs, and techniques available, there is one absolutely, positively, 100% guaranteed way to improve your life. It is free and anyone, anywhere can do it.

And... we all know it.

We have heard it since we were children. It is a law of the universe that can't be denied.

Here is it.

As you sow, so shall ye reap.

Put another way... if you want to improve your life, sow more seeds of goodness.

If you want to be happier, sow more seeds of happiness.

Simple, I know. But powerful and true.

While we are just beginning to understand the working of our universe, this law of the harvest does seem to be true.

What you give out you get back.

To put this in modern day application...

Your life is a reflection of the seeds you have sown or the actions and behaviors in which you have engaged.

If you want a better, more fulfilling, happier life, sow more seeds that bring happiness and fullment.

If you want your children to improve their behavior, sow more seeds of good parenting.

If you want your relationship to be healthier, sow more healthy marriage seeds.

If you want people to be more friendly, sow more friendly seeds.

You get the picture.

Do you want to see if this law is true? Here is a way for you to prove that the law of the harvest will work for you:

Take one day, (today is a good one), and see how many goodness seeds you can sow. At the end of the day, look back and see how you feel.

Now of course some seeds take longer to bloom than others, and not every seed is going to all of a sudden burst forth into a huge tree, still, you will reap the rewards of your seeds by the end of the day. And it will be only the beginning.

What kind of seeds can you plant?

How about a bunch of smile seeds? A phone call to a loved one? Maybe words of kindness to the store clerk? How about some words of gratitude to your children? Or a bit of extra gentleness to your beloved?

I bet you could easily sow a hundred seeds in one day if you put your mind to it.

Whatever needs improving in your life, find some seeds to sow and you will be surprised at how quickly your life starts improving!

With love and peace,

jennifer

The Stick that Turned into a Person

I know it sounds impossible but it is true.

A stick turned into a person.

Let me tell you the story.

Last year, in May of 2007 I had a stick. It didn't have any roots, or leaves, or flowers; it was just a stick about a foot long.

Well, I knew it may be a special stick so I planted it in rich soil from my garden near an wrought iron trellis in the back of my home outside my kitchen window where I knew it would get plenty of sunshine.

I made sure it got a lot of water and gave the stick special nutrients to make it happy. I checked on it every day and watched to see if it had any magical qualities.

Nothing happened for a few months. Still, I watered my stick, I fed it, and carefully attended to it.

Finally, one day I knelt down to check on my stick and noticed a few little specks of green dotting its sides. I knew there were special things to come.

After several weeks leaves started popping up all around my stick, in fact the stick started growing and turning green.

The stick grew and grew until it was nearly as tall as me. Then the truly miraculous thing happened. Little berries started to appear on its small branches. The stick continued to grow and brought forth a few dozen of the juiciest raspberries one could eat.

Now, a year later my little stick has become a very large plant filled with enough raspberries to make a few pies and a couple of jars of jam.

And here is the miracle. As I eat the berries, they turn into me. They become me. The raspberries actually change into me as their particles transform into my body.

Now, each day we take into our body all sorts of foods, (and a whole bunch of stuff that is not food), but it all becomes us.

Do we ever stop to think about what is actually happening as we bring into our body nutrients? The food doesn't go through us but turns into us.

The vitamins in my magical raspberries become my vitamins. Its life gives me life. It sacrificed its life for me.

Put another way, the stick and the raspberry transformed sunlight into a form I could take into my body to live. In turn I will tranform that very sunlight as I go through my day bringing forth whatever I will.

I can't get over this.

That little ordinary stick, somewhere deep inside its DNA was awakened as I provided a space to allow it to blossom, and in turn, my stick provided me with life giving, life sustaining nutrients.

Ahhh, life is a miracle.


Blessings and peace,

Jennifer

Strenghening your Weakest Point - Joseph Campbell Quote

"The Universe always strikes you at your weakest point because thats what most needs strengthening."

Joseph Campbell

How to Heal the World in Fifteen Minutes

The world is filled with organizations, religions, think tanks, medical experts, and a host of people trying to figure out how to heal our individual lives; our families, our communities, and our world.

We have medications, programs, spiritual leaders, therapists, philosophies, rituals, ceremonies, and doctrine all focusing on ways to make our world a better place.

I applaud them all. Anything any one can do to improve our situation is honored and respected.

However, our world of 6.5 billion people is complex. We don't all have access to clean drinking water, let alone funds to attend the latest self help conference. While there are thousands of fabulous books that provide help and insight, many of our human family are more concerned with putting food in the mouths of their children than they are finding money to purchase a book.

The religions of the world, while many provide peace and comfort to members, often simultaneously create conflict, division, and even violence toward each other.

The latest therapies or medical care may be helpful for some, but again they are expensive, often experimental, and the much of the world is left without care of any sort.

We can't all read the great philosophers, attend the best universities, or even understand the complexities of some religions.

What are we to do?

Is there a way to heal our lives? Our world? Is there something every single person on the planet could do that didn't cost any money, that didn't require traveling, great amounts of time, a large investment of energy? Something the old and young, male and female, rich and poor, healthy and sick can do? Something that wasn't limited by one's color of skin, cultural heritage, religious orientation or philosophical belief?

Is there something that is largely missing in our lives that may give us a new approach?

I came up with one answer, (although I am sure there are others)...

Fifteen minutes each day of silent contemplation and intention.

That is it.

Whether one is inclined toward prayer, meditation, communing with nature, or sitting in silence and stillness, I believe fifteen minutes a day holding an intention to live more consciously and graciously would change the world.

It requires fifteen minutes. That is it. Fifteen minutes a day to heal our world.

I know it sounds too simple, too ordinary, too boring. It isn't a miracle cure or a divine revelation, or a fabulous invention or discovery. Just a simple way to change our lives and the world.

Now, I'm not suggesting each and every problem will evaporate over night if we all start meditating or praying. (Although it could). What I do believe however is that the problems of our world are directly correlated with lack of care, attention, and conscious living.

The more I contemplated this idea over the last several weeks the more I am convinced that there is not a single problem we face that won't be eliminated, or at least vastly diminished if we live more consciously and with greater care.

Spending fifteen minutes each morning with the intention to live more carefully and conscientiously gives changes our minds, our hearts, our actions. Suddenly we see others differently, we notice how are actions effect others, we find ourselves observing the world in a different light.

In this world of instant everything, from pudding to communication, it seems we have nearly forgotten what it means to live. We are so busy with running, texting, calling, emailing, and catching up that we may have lost sight of the meaning of life.

We eat without even noticing (or knowing) what we are putting in our mouths, our conversations become superficial, our relationships unimportant, our creatively non-existence. Our lives become robotic like as we miss the meaning and purpose of existence. And our unconscious living is reflected in the problems of our world.

My heart tells me that the more we live with awareness, the more our world, and our individual lives will heal.

Try fifteens a day of silent contemplation with the intention to live more consciously... you never know how it might change your life... and the world.

Are you a Rebel? The World Needs You!

Are you a rebel?

Growing up, my connotation of a rebel was one of a wayward teenager who dropped out of school, wouldn't get a job, and spent their lives high and out of touch with reality.

In many respects being a rebel has a negative connotation, yet I have a sense that today we are in great need of a few. In fact, I feel certain without some serious rebels our world will not heal.

What is a rebel?

In part, the American Heritage dictionary defines a rebel as:

To resist or defy a generally accepted convention.

To feel or express strong unwillingness or repugnance.

Do we need some rebels? Absolutely!

Are there accepted conventions that are not healthy for humanity?

No question!

Are you willing to express strong unwillingness or repugnance at some of what is common and accepted in society?

As I look around I observe common and accepted, even celebrated behavior that is clearly unhealthy, even destructive to individual life, our planetary family, all of life, and even our very planet.

To rebel against something doesn't necessarily mean we fight against it, it means we refuse to be a part of it. We disengage from it. We eliminate it from our experience.

I believe the way to remove the darkness from our world is not to fight darkness but to bring light. In addition, we can decide today to not add more darkness by refusing to encourage or support the darkness. We can make a commitment to not engage in that which clearly harms our community, our world, and our lives.

So, what sorts of common everyday traits of our society might you be unwilling to accept?

Here are ten ways to rebel against common and accepted attitudes and behaviors*:

1. An unwillingness to partake of the the violence that permeates our society.

2. An unwillingness to celebrate the objectification and exploitation of women.

3. An unwillingness to worship money, power, and fame.

4. An unwillingness to take into my body substances that are harmful and poisonous.

5. An unwillingness to engage in the voyeurism, used for entertainment.

6. An unwillingness to place human extravagance over the creatures of our planet.

7. An unwillingness to honor gluttony and greed.

8. An unwillingness to support the gruesome, salacious, and tawdry.

9. An unwillingness to follow the crowd, lower one's standards, and accept the status quo.

10. An unwillingness to forget, dismiss, and ignore the pain and suffering of others.

The world is in need to those whose heart feels the light, who sense the impulse for transformation, who glimpse a new way of life.

We need people who will take the hero's journey, mythologist Joseph Campbell spoke of; those who will leave the safety of the tribe and discover a new way. The world needs people who are strong, secure, and creative who don't engage in the ordinary, common, and comfortable but who can rise above it all to bring us an expanded world view, one of health, peace, and kindness.

So.....are you a rebel?


*Of course there are many others!

The Day I Danced with an Angel

The day started like all school mornings. Dawn was breaking, our puppy needed to go out, and our week day routine was getting underway; nothing particularly unusual.

I couldn't image that this day I would spend a moment in heaven.

I was slicing a banana to put over Cheerios, while my son was upstairs getting dressed and ready for school. While I was pouring orange juice, my beautiful son with Down Syndrome quietly slinked half way down the stairs and peeked over the banister, his impish face filled with anticipation and unexpected surprise he said,

“Mom, do you want to dance?”

He had the biggest, sweetest smile on his face, his almond eyes as bright as the morning light sparkling though my kitchen window.

“Of course,” I exclaimed. We were running a little late that morning but who could pass up such an offer?

I quickly met my son on the stairs. He grabbed my hand and led him to his room. There he got out a CD and played the heart-warming song, sung by Ella Fitzgerald, “We’re the best of friends,” from Disney’s, The Fox and the Hound.

He held my hands and we danced together.

My son's smile reflected pure joy, his whole body radiated love, his giggles were the sounds of heaven; his sparkly eyes filled my heart and soul with pure joy.

We swayed to the music, he spun me around like a ballroom dancer. We looked into each others eyes and shared one of the most beautiful moments of my life. A moment I will never forget.

When the tender song slowly came to an end, my son gave me a big hug and said, “Mom, you are my best friend.”

Who knew that on this ordinary day in June, I would experience heaven and dance with an angel.



To read more about my son, I have an Angel!

Where is Joy? Not Where You Think!

Humankind has been taught a lie.

We have the mistaken belief that if we only find the activity, person, object of our desire we will find joy. Not so.

This is a myth, a creation of the ego, a completely false understanding of life.

It is destructive and actually impedes are joy.

We may find momentary pleasure in various activities, (be they healthy or not), and certainly we experience joy as we engage with loved ones or accomplish a goal, however, the object, person, or accomplishment is not what gives us joy; the joy is what we bring forth to the experience. The joy is inside, created in our self shared with the world.

For example, think of a flower bringing forth a beautiful scent for the gardener to experience. The flower creates the perfume. The perfume is not external to the flower but is an essence of it. And miraculously, the flower's scent is captured by the gardener, allowing the fullness of the flower to manifest.

So too with humankind. Our "scent" is our joy. What is within us comes forth, comes out of us. Our very essence is extended as we interact with the world. What is in us, what we are is that which materializes into being. Experiencing joy is not in something other than us, but is experienced as we bring that which is deep within us into reality.

Eckhart Tolle wrote,

"When you say, ’I enjoy doing this or that’, it is really a misperception. It makes it appear that the joy comes from what you do, but that is not the case. Joy does not come from what you do, it flows into what you do and thus into this world from deep within you."

If we are searching for joy in something "out there" we will be lost. We will not find it because it is not somewhere out there to be found. And joy will not awaken through an activity that gives us pleasure but will manifest as we bring joy to our world.

What if a life has no joy? What about those depressed, filled with sorrow, living in emotional pain?

Of course there are chemical imbalances and neurological disorders that get in the way of joy and can create serious illness, and there are those whose lives are filled with difficult challenges and heartbreaking sorrows.

But trying to overcome the sorrows of life by indulging in an activity, or getting more possessions, or finding the "right" partner, will be an effort in futility. Better to notice where one can bring their joy, their creativity, their purpose.

The more one finds a way to bring forth the beauty that is within, the more joy is experienced.

So where does that leave us? How do we find joy?

We find it by contributing our gifts, by sharing our uniqueness, with others, with the world.

The Secret to Managing the Sorrows of our World

There are those days where the problems of the world seem overwhelming, the sorrows too much to take into my soul.

We see the suffering of millions of our fellow human beings in virtually ever continent on our planet; natural disasters, human heartbreak, and violence seem ubiquitous.

At times it is just too much to bear, what do we do?

Chan Khong shares her secret:

"If we just worry about the big picture, we are powerless. So my secret is to start right away doing whatever little work I can do. I try to give joy to one person in the morning, and remove the suffering of one person in the afternoon. That is the secret. Start right now."

I hold her words in my heart...

The Soul of a Genius - Mozart

“Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius.”


~ Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

In a world that is desperate for healing, for answers, for goodness, for peace, may we remember that the genius required for transformation is not in our scholarly research nor in our brilliant brains, but in our heart.

Love, love, love!

Violent Children....Are you Shocked?

Several times today I heard newscasters and viewers expressing shock over some of the horrific news concerning our violent children.

We hear...

* Eight teenagers arrested for beating up a classmate and video taping the incident to play on You Tube.

* A class of third graders creating a plan to kill their teacher.

* A middle school girl getting beaten up by classmates for her stand on illegal immigration.

* Two children, eight and ten, crushing the hip as they beat up a classmate.

* Students trying to beat up their teacher.

* Out of control bullying, young people going wild, and children killing children throughout the country.

I wonder why anyone is shocked?

I would be shocked if we did not hear such stories.

As horrific as these are, they are only a reflection of the violent society in which our children exist. Given the movies, video games, advertisements, and music to which our children are exposed how could we expect anything other than violent children?

Do we somehow think our children can emerge from such a violent culture as ours without embracing what we celebrate?

Do we think children are not soaking up the messages we boldly and carefully them?

Are we oblivious to what they have downloaded on their Ipods? What their games are teaching? What their music is suggesting?

We adults seem surprised by the children who are only reflecting the culture we gave them.

Who is to blame?

We can blame parents but certainly the parents cannot possibly watch their children every moment of every day.

We can blame schools but they are having to compete with a media more interested in making money than creating healthy children.

We can blame children but they are a product of our world.

We can blame the entertainment industry, or peers, or some political or religious misfortune or malfunction.

Or we can realize that the point is not blame but on healing the problem, restoring a sense of care, and finding peace.

It is time each of us individually, and as a community and society and world family decide we will not support the violence permeating our culture and destroying our children.

It is time we decide we will no longer tolerate a world filled with harm and cruelty.

It is time we take a stand and stop supporting, financially and emotionally those aspects of our society that are hurting our children.

So long as we teach our children violence is the way to manage life, that hurting others is acceptable, that physical harm is appropriate and normal, we will have violent children.

Enough is enough!

Some research from the Federal Trade Commission demonstrating how the media is working to target our young people with material deemed inappropriate for their emotional health:


Marketing Violent Media to Children

A brief summary:

Movies: Of the 44 movies rated R for violence the Commission selected for its study, the Commission found that 35, or 80 percent, were targeted to children under 17. Marketing plans for 28 of those 44, or 64 percent, contained express statements that the films target audience included children under 17. Plans for the other seven movies were either extremely similar to the plans of the films that did identify an under-17 target audience, or they detailed plans indicating they were targeting that age group, such as promoting the film in high schools or publications with majority under-17 audiences.

Music: Of the 55 music recordings with explicit content labels the Commission selected for its review, the Commission found that all were targeted to children under 17. Marketing plans for 15, or 27 percent, expressly identified children under 17 as part of their target audience. The documents for the remaining 40 explicit-content labeled recordings did not expressly state the age of the target audience, but detailed plans indicating they were targeting that age group, including placing advertising in media that would reach a majority or substantial percentage of children under 17.

Games: Of the 118 electronic games with a Mature rating for violence, the Commission selected for its study, 83, or 70 percent, targeted children under 17. The marketing plans for 60 of these, or 51 percent, expressly included children under 17 in the target audience. Documents for the remaining 23 games showed plans to advertise in magazines or on television shows with a majority or substantial under-17 audience.

Watch your Thoughts with Care - Buddha Quote

"The thought manifests as the word. The word manifests as the deed. The deed develops into habit. And the habit hardens into character. So watch the thought and its ways with care. And let it spring from love, born out of concern for all beings."

Buddha

How to Make Your Path Smoother

How do we make our lives easier, simpler, less stressful, filled with more peace, happiness and joy?

The world is filled with ideas, theories, and techniques to make life better.

We have thousands of religions, political ideologies, and ancient and new philosophies.

We have remedies, pharmacological intervention, and hundreds of substances, some illegal and harmful all intended to bring us peace and happiness.

We have those behaviors that many of us falsely think will bring happiness but are in fact a very poor imitation, like gambling, porn, and shopping addictions.

We have books, articles, and research filled with a myriad of theories, ideas, and approaches to make life better.

Still, happiness and joy seems to elude much of the world. While individuals may find beauty and peace in their particular beliefs, the world seems largely to find happiness and joy elusive.

Is there an answer?

We know how the brain works, how substances impact our bodies, how horrible addiction is and still we persist. We know our world suffers from wars, anger, abuse and on we go. We have thousands of years of wisdom, modern day research and yet we still fight and harm one another.

I do not know much, but I know one thing...

......the more we live to bring kindness into the world, the better life is.

Myrtle Reed writes,

"If we all tried to make other people's paths easy, our own feet would have a smooth even place to walk on."

Today, may we do our best to make the path easier for others, and in our efforts we just may find we have made our own path smoother.

Namaste!

The Crisis Facing Girls and Teenagers

American girls and teenagers are facing a crisis!

Of the hundreds of teenagers and young women I have worked with over the years, body image issues may be the most damaging and difficult for girls in our society. They are often at the heart of depression, anxiety, self esteem, even suicide.

As a society we must rethink the message we are sending our girls, teenagers and young women, we must take a good hard and honest look at what we are promoting, what we are encouraging, and what we are celebrating!

"Today, the body has become most girls' primary project, creating a degree of self-consciousness and dissatisfaction that is pervasive and often dangerous."*

A few statistics to give us a glimpse of what is going on...

Ten percent of the girls in our country are suffering from an eating disorder.

One in four teenage girls is a life long carrier of an STD.

Thousands of girls are "cutting", using razor blades and knives to harm their bodies.

The suicide rate among girls 10-19 is literally skyrocketing out of control.

From Psychology Today,

"There is an epidemic of low self-esteem, because parents haven't had the time it takes to build it. That has left adolescent girls prey to body image issues, so that none ever sees herself as good enough no matter how slim.

The compare/compete dynamic is out of control right now: who is the hottest girl, who's the most popular, the dumbest, the biggest dork?"

We have a society filled with a most unhealthy message that is literally destroying our girls! We must wake, take note, and realize what we as a society have created.

Take a few seconds to get a quick glimpse of what our society has promoted...

Onslaught.... by Dove Campaign for Real Beauty. Is it any wonder we are in crisis?




What can you do?

First, become aware of the messages being sent to the girls and women of our society! Notice what messages girls are inundated with each and every day!

Psychology Today, in an article on Depression in Teens and Girls suggests, "Appreciate how different their world is from ours, and expose yourself to the culture your kids are immersed in. Look on it as an anthropological exploration. Ask kids what's hip and what they are paying attention to. Watch a half hour of MTV for a couple of weeks. Ask your kids to show you some of their favorite computer games and video games. Look at the magazines teen girls read. Go online to good teen websites."

I view the solution to the problem from two perspectives.

1. Eliminate the negative.
2. Encourage the positive.

Let me elaborate.

Eliminate the negative.

Become an activist! Let your opinions be known!

Refuse to support those companies who send messages to our girls that their value is in their bodies; their sexual attractiveness to men.

Refuse to watch television shows that are sponsored by those companies.

Refuse to shop in stores that send unhealthy messages to young people.

Refuse to purchase music videos that promote the unhealthy sexualization of women.

Send a quick email to those companies who you find offensive and let them know of your displeasure.

Do not comment on physical appearance, either positively or negatively. The goal is to not have a girl focus on her body.

In other words, do what you can to eliminate the unhealthy and harmful messages!

Encourage the positive

As parents we can encourage young women to become involved in healthy activities. For example, we know the more girls participate in sports the higher their self esteem. Similarly as girls are involved in service organizations, community projects, and creative outlets they feel better about themselves.

Support those companies who are responsibly promoting their products.

As parents, do your best to promote healthy viewing and media. Notice the great films that do not exploit and objectify women.

Take every opportunity to demonstrate and promote truly beautiful women... women of every age who are healthy, happy, fulfilled, and contributing to this world in truly positive ways! No need for beauty to be associated with body appearance or the shape and size of a form!

Study the lives of truly great women who have made a difference in this world! Read the biographies of women who have truly changed our human society! Learn about great women! Purchase books, visit museum, fill your home and life with positive role models.

In sum, we have created a society that is unhealthy and destructive for girls and adolescents. It is a crisis. We are headed down a path that is increasingly worsening without an observable end.

When will we wake up and realize what we have done? When will companies put the health of our young people over profit? When will the media stop promoting unhealthy messages? When will marketing firms stop objectifying woman as a way to promote their products? When will we as parents stop allowing the unhealthy messages come into our homes?

It is my deepest plea and prayer that we can promote and celebrate health, goodness, and kindness; and embrace women as lovely human beings regardless of their appearance. It is time we honor and support those people, companies and organizations that are working to make a difference in this world.


A few additional resources:

A must read book, The Body Project, by Joan Jacobs Brumberg helps us understand what is happening to our girls and teenagers in this sexualized society.

The Dove Campaign for Beauty is one of my favorite organizations. Dove is a company truly doing its best to promote a healthy approach to beauty and life. They are responsible in their adds, careful in their approach, and truly working to encourage self-esteem in girls, teenagers, and young women.

The following are a few links to get involved in a movement intending to promote a healthy message to girls and young women!

If you would like to help young women find their true beauty and raise their self esteem, click here: Get involved!

To help your daughters and their friends, click here: Moms and Mentors!

A special site filled with activities to boost the self-esteem of girls and teenagers: Self Esteem Zone


*The Body Project

Six Billion Paths to Peace - Join Me

The most wonderful Shinnyo-en foundation has created a world-changing project of which we can all be a part:

Six Billion Paths to Peace

"The mission is to inspire people worldwide that the small selfless actions they take in their daily lives often times have a tremendous positive ripple effect that can bring greater harmony to the world. For many of us, a path to peace is about performing selfless acts of kindness, which in return often inspire others to do the same. That’s why the Shinnyo-en Foundation launched the Six Billion Paths to Peace Initiative."

Does it sound like a wonderful project?

If you want to be a part of this fabulous endeavor, simply go to Six Billion Paths to Peace and share your ideas on how to spread goodness. A few simple sentences then click send! That is it.

Then... the fun part! On March 20, in Times Square NYC there will be a gathering to celebrate the Six Billion Paths to Peace Initiative. There on the Reuters board for all the world to see will be all the ideas people have sent in from around the globe to spread goodness and kindness on our planet!

Please join me in this effort to bring an awareness that the world is filled with good people wishing to make a difference!

My little quote I added to the collective thoughts on kindness...

"Spread seeds of kindness wherever you go and know a garden of goodness will emerge!"

I'm convinced that every little step we take to bring forth a world of peace is making a difference!

I invite you to join with me and others throughout the world in sharing our Paths to Peace!

With love,

Jennifer

One more thing, if you like the idea you are tagged to spread the word!

I created this watercolor mandala to reflect my hope as we join together to spread light and love to our world. Feel free to use image if you wish. Click on image to enlargen.

Kindness, Beauty, and Truth

"The ideals which have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been kindness, beauty, and truth."

~Albert Einstein

Watercolor by me